Jenny's StoryJennifer Vaughn Bates was a 38 year old vibrant, confident, and caring friend, mother and daughter. She was college educated having attended both Virginia Tech and George Mason, and worked as a therapist and counselor for Prince William County. Like many of us, Jenny longed to find someone to reciprocate all of the love she had to give. In 2005 she reconnected with an old acquaintance, Robert Bates. They dated, married, had a child together, and participated in many social activities with friends and family. On the outside they looked like the any average suburban family. Inside was a different story. Robert struggled with substance abuse and physically, emotionally, and verbally abused Jenny on a regular basis in front of her two boys. Jenny suggested couples counseling on numerous occasions, but Robert refused. Jenny felt she was unable to leave due to financial constraints, and strived to keep her family together for their young son. Jenny's “enough” moment came on June 26, 2010, when Robert threw their four year old son across the garage while he was trying to protect his mother. Robert was arrested for domestic abuse, and a temporary restraining order was issued. Jenny found the courage to come forward with her abuse to her friends and family and decided to end her marriage. Begrudgingly, Robert moved out, and they began to work on the sale of their house. |
Then, on September 18, 2010, the unimaginable happened. The details are still unclear, but it is believed that somehow Robert gained access to the house, forcing Jenny into her car at gunpoint. They drove to a townhome community where neighbors watched in horror as Jenny, in an attempt to escape, ran from the car screaming for help. Robert followed, chasing her down and shooting her in the head. He then turned the gun on himself. Robert died at the scene, Jenny died at the hospital.
Jenny left behind two sons, ages 15 and 4, as well as countless friends, family members, patients, and colleagues. Jenny and Robert had limited life insurance, a small savings and no will, leaving an unexpected financial burden on her father, who has worked tirelessly to secure custody and provide a stable environment for her two boys.
Knowing Jenny would want the tragedy of her death to have a purpose, “No Woman, No Cry” was born. She spent her life helping others, but ironically could not save herself. The five year silence of her abuse haunts those who love and miss her. Jenny’s story was covered widely by the local media, resulting in our being contacted by The National Network to End Domestic Violence (NNEDV), who assisted us initially to cope with our loss. Through our NNEDV experiences we were shocked to learn that one in every four women is a victim of domestic abuse. That means in a circle of four women, one is likely being abused and most often, suffers in silence.
Since October, 2010, we have participated in a number of NNEDV functions and witnessed the extraordinary support and services they provide. As a result we have partnered with them to raise money and awareness with the No Woman, No Cry…Stop the Silence to End Domestic Violence 5K Walk.
We hope that you will help us continue Jenny’s work by providing support and a voice to those who need help in ending the silence of domestic violence.
Click here to watch a video celebrating Jenny's life.
Jenny left behind two sons, ages 15 and 4, as well as countless friends, family members, patients, and colleagues. Jenny and Robert had limited life insurance, a small savings and no will, leaving an unexpected financial burden on her father, who has worked tirelessly to secure custody and provide a stable environment for her two boys.
Knowing Jenny would want the tragedy of her death to have a purpose, “No Woman, No Cry” was born. She spent her life helping others, but ironically could not save herself. The five year silence of her abuse haunts those who love and miss her. Jenny’s story was covered widely by the local media, resulting in our being contacted by The National Network to End Domestic Violence (NNEDV), who assisted us initially to cope with our loss. Through our NNEDV experiences we were shocked to learn that one in every four women is a victim of domestic abuse. That means in a circle of four women, one is likely being abused and most often, suffers in silence.
Since October, 2010, we have participated in a number of NNEDV functions and witnessed the extraordinary support and services they provide. As a result we have partnered with them to raise money and awareness with the No Woman, No Cry…Stop the Silence to End Domestic Violence 5K Walk.
We hope that you will help us continue Jenny’s work by providing support and a voice to those who need help in ending the silence of domestic violence.
Click here to watch a video celebrating Jenny's life.